Monday, June 16, 2014

The Talking Cucumber

What did the cucumber say to the vinegar?

"Well, this is a fine pickle you've gotten us into!"

Thanks to Matthew for contributing this joke from his book--
Jokelopedia The Biggest, Best, Silliest, Dumbest Joke Book Ever

Monday, May 26, 2014

Amethysts

Amethysts


By J.C.



      When people hear the word amethyst, what comes to mind? Smooth, pure jewelry? Rocky, jagged gemstones? The February birthstone? Above all, though, they normally think of the color purple. But the truth is, there is a lot more about the amethyst than the simple fact it’s purple and the February birthstone! Found in varying colors, it can be found all over the world and has been believed to prevent drunkenness and encourage calmness. Made of different substances (including iron) and at one point as prized as the diamond, this is one treasure that won’t soon be forgotten.
       It is a fact that the birthstone for February is amethyst, but that’s not the only job the amethyst has served. When six years of marriage are celebrated, it is the gemstone for that anniversary. “Ahlamah” is amethyst in Jewish, and means “to dream.” The amethyst is also referenced a few times in the Bible. In Exodus 28:19, it is mentioned as the third gemstone in the third row on the breastplate of Aaron. Amazingly, it is also referenced in Revalation 21:20 when it is indicated that it will be part of the foundation of New Jerusalem!
       Most people are aware that the amethyst is the birthstone for February, but not everyone knows why. In early Egypt, Queen Cleopatra always wore an amethyst ring that was said to draw Roman lovers to her. Believing this to be true, Roman women started wearing amethyst jewelry, having confidence it would assist in keeping their husbands faithful. As a result, amethyst was known as “the stone of lovers,” and since Valentine’s Day is in February, it became the birthstone for that month.
      The most treasured and prized gemstone in the quartz family, amethyst can be found in purple, lilac, or mauve, and occasionally has a white streak. As the crystal—which can appear to have reddish or bluish tints from angles—winds on through its average 4-6 inches, the color grows darker as it arrives at the tip. Used in all forms of jewelry, the amethyst’s color is thought to be regal. Some forms of amethyst are polished pebble, crystal slice, oval mixed, or rectangular step. Often, the amethyst also has inside markings as well. Though African, Bolivian, Brazilian, and Siberian are true amethysts, the ones that are Bengal and Oriental are actually purple sapphires. Either way, it is unmistakable that the amethyst is a special and precious jewel.
      The amethyst can be found in many places all around the world.  Brazil, Madagascar, Zambia, Uruguay, Burma, India, Canada, Mexico, Namibia, Russia, Sri Lanki and the United States is where it is mostly found, though the U.S. amethysts are not usually jewelry quality; Brazil contains the best amounts. However, Austria has the largest amount in one area. Normally, the amethyst occurs around where granite is located and sometimes is color-zoned. It is found in alluvial deposits, which is a water source in which minerals, gems, and crystals are rushed through the waters and then uncovered during slow currents. Geodes, or chambers inside rocks that are edged and lined with gems, are another place to search for the amethyst. But whether alluvial deposit or geode, the amethyst is undoubtedly a worldwide stone.
      Made of agate and iron and a member of the quartz family, the amethyst ranks up to a level of 7 on the hardness scale. Its specific gravity level is 2.7. The substances that make up the amethyst are silicon dioxide, or SiO2. Some believe the amethyst’s purple color is due to manganese, but there is no proof behind this. When the amethyst is heated, it turns yellow and brown, appearing like citrine. A lot of people confuse citrine with heated amethyst, and sometimes, gems that are really heat-treated amethysts are sold as citrine mistakingly. When the amethyst is placed in cold temperatures, it can turn a smoky gray. While no one is sure of the exact minerals that predict the amethyst’s color, it is nevertheless still full of amazing compounds.
      The amethyst’s value has varied over the years. Unbelievably, it used to be as valuable as the diamond, but after more and more discoveries were made, it dropped in value and price. Today, the amethyst’s value is based of the color, rather than size. Though amethysts of all sizes are easily available, it is the certain colors that are sparse, with the rarest—and most expensive—being the deep Siberian purple. Besides that element, prices on this gem can be cheap or very expensive.
       There are a lot of myths, beliefs, and legends behind this amazing jewel. In the church, the amethyst was one of the church officials’ favorites. One thing a bishop would wear was an amethyst ring, therefore the amethyst was referred to as the highest, “bishop’s grade.” It was believed that the amethyst also had sobering elements. Its name comes from the ancient Greek word “amethustos,” which means “not drunken,” or “sober.”
      People thought amethyst supported and encouraged serious and sober minds; and that if one drank from a cup made of amethyst, it would be impossible to get drunk. Ancient Egyptians used the amethyst to represent the zodiac sign for the goat. Then, the goat was the enemy of vineyards, and since vineyards produce wine, the goat was the enemy of wine, thereof so was the amethyst.
  The ancient Greeks, which was the first society to truly acknowledge the amethyst, had a very strange way to tell the story of how the amethyst came to be through a intriguing myth. The myth says that once the god of wine, Dionysus, grew angry as a result of drunkenness and proclaimed that the first person to pass him would be eaten by tigers. When a maiden named Amethyst happened to be that person, she shouted for help from the goddess Diana. Diana transformed Amethyst into a white quartz to protect her from the vicious beasts. When Dionysus saw this, he was regretful and poured his red wine over the quartz, turning it purple, creating the amethyst.
  The amethyst also had a high reputation in those days. People were convinced it did many things besides avert drunkenness: they believed it would guard against anger and violence and inspire peace, courage, and contemplation. It was thought to administer evil thoughts, bring out intelligence, prevent soldiers from battle-related traumas, help encourage victory, to aid hunters in finding game. If a person wore the amethyst, they had protection against diseases, and, if the bear sign was engraved in the jewel, would be shielded against demons—or so they trusted. Though these beliefs have never been proven, the legends are yet fascinating.
      Treasured, prized, and gorgeous, the amethyst is an elegant, glamorous gemstone thriving in places all over the world, throughout all civilizations, no matter what the value. Cherished by all people of all lands, this agate-and-iron based quartz stone has been adored and protected with stories and myths, and honored by legends. A special jewel in the past and a special jewel in the present, the amethyst will unequivocally live on a special jewel for years to come.

Friday, May 23, 2014

The Underground Railroad

The Underground Railroad
By Joy

       Starting thousands of years ago, the horrible history of slavery began.  Because of the millions of slaves, who needed help escaping from their owner’s serious wrath, the Underground Railroad was quickly formed.  Harriet Tubman was one of these slaves, but with help from the devoted Underground Railroad, she became a free woman and helped save hundreds of other slaves.
       Thousands of years of history have experienced the effects of slavery, the situation has improved.  During the 1800s slavery was typical in the southern states until it was abolished.  Slavery conditions varied dramatically.  The conditions of most slaves were absolutely terrible.  Giving privileges, some masters were kind, which slaves appreciated.  Sadly, slavery was a divisive issue during the 19th century in the United States.
       Unfortunately the United States has a long history with slavery.  In 1776, Thomas Jefferson, who was the third President of the United States, stated, in the Declaration of Independence, that slavery was not less immoral than, “murder, robbery, lewdness, and barbarity”.  He called the slave trade, “ a cruel war against human nature itself, violating its most sacred rights of life and liberty”.  Continental Congress removed this anti-slavery wording out of the Declaration of Independence because they didn’t want to displease the Southerners.  Before 1860 there were four million slaves in America.  Having plenty to do with slavery, the Civil war was an ongoing fight between the North and South.  The United States eventually put an end to slavery on December 18, 1865.  
       The slaves’ conditions varied depending on where they lived, worked, and their masters’ kindness.  Most adult slaves were given one pair of shoes, two outfits, and one blanket made of scratchy wool, which was extremely worn out after a year.  Slaves, who worked in the master’s house, ate better food, got better clothes, and were privileged to sleep in the master’s house.  Those who worked outside were not allowed inside of the master’s house. They lived in slave quarters with no furniture.
       Slaves couldn’t do anything without a pass from their owner, they couldn’t even walk down the street.  They didn’t own anything, including their name.  They had no idea when they were born.  Dejectedly, slaves were sold at auctions like they were an animal and were chained at night so they couldn’t run away. They would be forced to work all day and sometimes all night.  Many got sick and died.  Then the masters or overseers would simply buy new slaves to replace them.  For slaves, conditions were outrageous.
       Starting thousands of years ago, slavery destroyed the lives of countless families. Millions were speedily stolen from their homes overseas where they were cruelly brought to America, which begins the history of slavery during the 19th century in the United States.  The history of slavery started thousands of years ago.  Some were lucky enough that their masters treated them well, others were not.  For most slaves the conditions were terrible.  Sadly millions were taken away from their native homes and families.  Few escaped.
       Millions were captured, less than 3% escaped with help from the Underground Railroad.   The Underground Railroad existed when slavery was very prevalent in America, during the 19th century.  To make the Underground Railroad possible, there were plenty of different codes.  After having run away if a slave was captured, the consequences were extremely harsh.  What really was this Underground Railroad?
       The Underground Railroad wasn’t underground or a railroad.  It was a secret way for the slaves to travel north, to freedom.  A popular destinations was Canada.  The Underground Railroad got its name during the 1800’s.  Although its peak years were 1830-1860.  Using many codes, the Underground Railroad was unquestionably secretive.  Slaves referred to the Ohio River as the Jordan River, a biblical reference, and Canada as the “Promised Land”.  The imaginary line between the slave states and the free states was called the Mason-Dixon line.  The Underground Railroad meant salvation for many slaves.
       The Underground Railroad was very secretive.  Therefore many codes were put into place.  For example; “stations” were houses where the slaves were hidden, the people, who were in charge of the stations, were called “station masters”, and guides were known as “conductors”.  The average distance from station to station was 10-15 miles, which meant that a trip could take two days up to a year.  The busiest stations were the ones that bordered the slave states.  Running away, slaves would use disguises.  Some traveled by horse drawn carts, carriages, boats, and horses, but most walked.  The routes on the underground railroad weren’t in a straight line.  This way it was extremely hard for the slave hunters to catch fugitives.   Even though the Underground Railroad was secretive, some slaves were still caught and punished.
       Caught slaves were extremely punished.  Any slave who was caught could be severely whipped, have their feet put in stocks, their feet cut off so they were crippled, or even be killed.  Being chased by slave hunters, some slaves were shot.  Almost four million slaves were captured from their native homeland and brought to the South, only about a hundred thousand escaped.  Slaves who ran away must have been desperate knowing that the punishment was harsh.
       With help from the Underground Railroad, hundreds of slaves escaped the serious wrath from their owners, by traveling north to freedom.  The Underground Railroad was very secretive, as this made it hard for the slave hunters to track them down.  When they were caught, the punishment could be deadly. Peacefully the Underground Railroad abetted many innocent slaves allowing them to start a new life in freedom.
       Rescuing 300 innocent slaves, Harriet Tubman quickly became one of the best conductors on the Underground Railroad.  As a child, Harriet herself was a slave.  She had many masters.  One day when her master died, Harriet was determined to escape.  Eventually Harriet, who was joyful, passed the Mason-Dixon line and was a free woman.  In a free state, Harriet decided she wanted to become a conductor and share her newfound joy.
       Harriet’s childhood family was like many others, except they were slaves.  Working at Edward Brodas’ plantation in Maryland, Benjamin Ross and Harriet Green, were married slaves.  Around 1820 they gave birth to an absolutely gorgeous girl, named Araminta, whose nickname was “Minty”.  Eventually Araminta, who was the eleventh sibling, was known as Harriet Tubman.  As a slave child it was rare to live with both parents.  Harriet was lucky.  During her childhood as a slave, even though she lived with both her parents, Harriet had plenty of masters.
       Harriet had many masters during her years as a slave.  Cruelly, most whipped her and wouldn’t train her, but expected her what to do.  Harriet, who was extremely strong, usually did odd jobs, including; taking care of the baby, dusting, sweeping, and lifting heavy loads.  Although Harriet was a human being, she was not treated like one,since she still was forced to do labor by various masters.
       In 1849, Harriet’s master died, which led her to think about escaping.  She had heard a rumor about how all the slaves were to be sold deep south, which meant harder work and worse conditions.  Along with her brothers, Harriet decided to escape because she figured this was the perfect chance.  Late in the night, she went to where her sister worked and sung to her,  

“I’ll meet you in de mornin’,
When you reach de promised land;
On the other side of Jordan,
For I’m bound for the promised land.”

       Sadly, not too long after they left, Harriet’s petrified brothers, who quickly became nervous, decided to return home.  Harriet knew that it was now or never.  She went on alone.  At last Harriet passed the Mason-Dixon line.  Later in her life she stated, “When I had found I had crossed that line, I looked at my hands to see if I was the same person.  There was such a glory over everything; the sun came like gold through the trees, and over the fields, and I felt like I was in heaven.”  After her escape she was joyful and wanted to share this new found joy she had, by becoming a conductor.
       Harriet became one of the best conductors around.  She went on 19 different trips and saved almost 300 slaves.  When on a trip with Harriet if a slave wanted to turn back,  Harriet would quickly point a pistol at him/her.  Harriet never had a slave turn back.  Her secrets saved.  Losing all she had worked for, Harriet understood was not an option.  At one point if someone caught Harriet, dead or alive, the reward was $40,000.  William Lloyd Garrison nicknamed her Moses, after Moses in the Bible, who saved the Israelites from Pharaoh. Extremely well known for being a conductor, Harriet saved hundreds of lives.
       As a child, Harriet, who had plenty of masters, was a slave.  When Harriet found the perfect chance, she instantaneously escaped.  She still risked her life and became a conductor on the Underground Railroad. By becoming a conductor Harriet Tubman saved numerous, innocent lives.  
       Slavery was absolutely prevalent in the southern states during the 19th century.  The Underground Railroad saved numerous lives.  Extremely intelligent, Harriet Tubman escaped when she found the chance.  The most significant thing is how Harriet Tubman, the Moses of the 19th century, saved hundreds of innocent lives through the Underground Railroad.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

A Book Review: The Medusa Plot

The Medusa Plot: A Book Review

by Nicholas

     The Medusa Plot is the first book in the Cahills vs. Vespers series. It is written by Gordon Korman, a writer who worked on the 39 Clues book series. Amy and Dan are back, but this time they are facing their most dangerous enemy: the Vespers. The Vespers kidnap 7 members of the Cahill family and hold them hostage. The Vespers demand that Amy and Dan bring them certain items, in order to release their family. The first demand in this book is to steal Caravaggio's painting Medusa. The Cahills pull off a daring heist at a museum but the Vespers require more. That will be continued in the next book, A King's Ransom. I thought this book was a great starting point for the series. I enjoyed this book and would recommend it to anyone who has read the 39 Clues or is looking for a good action/mystery book. Overall, I give The Medusa Plot four out of five stars. I hope you enjoyed my review!

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Different ways to tell a fable? Why, yes, I'm able!

Different ways to tell a fable? Why, yes, I'm able!

By Joy



      Writing comes in many styles.  I thought it would be fun to post the same Aesop Fable, but in three different styles.  I also am going to explain some of the characteristics of the forms of writing, and I will post my very own writing using the different techniques.

     First up is the Uncle Remus style.  This was my favorite style to imitate. Some of the characteristics are:

  • Double negatives (I used this technique in the first sentence.)
  • Phrase/sentence repeat
  • Onomatopoeia (Words that sound like they are spelled making a sound. Example: Crash, Bang Snap, etc.)
  • Misspelled dialect
    • sezee (says he)
    • en (and)
    • dat (that)
  • Word mush (Exactly as it sounds, mushing different words together.)
  • Lots of dialogue
  • Anything that takes effort to say, spell it a way that takes less effort to say
     When writing with this style make sure your readers can understand what your mushed words are meant to be.

The Bundle of Sticks
By Joy


“What didn’t the old man not do Uncle Remus,” asked the young boy.  
Uncle Remus started, “A very ol man at de point of dead, e was barely evin movin e was, bekond es sonz round im to give em some wizdem.  
‘Sarvents, go grab a bundl of stiks and bring em ere.’ sed de ol man, sezee. Den e sed to is ol son ‘Break i’
But de ol son jus cudn do i, de son cudn break i.  De oder sons tried, dey did, but dey cudn do i.  
‘Now ya sons o mine, unti de stiks, each o ya take wan.’ sed de ol man, sezee.  When de ad done so de ol man continud, ‘Now each of ya, ya sons o mine, break em.’ . Wen de stiks ere broke, de ol man sed, ‘Ya see, yunyin givs strength.



The next style is King James Version or KJV, for short. Personally, this style was much harder for me to write. Some things to recognize for this style is:
  • And (use the word and as many times as possible)
  • Thy, thou, thine, thee
  • Abnormal verb endings
    • replace -ing with -est
  • No quotes
  • Punctuation
    • use commas instead of period
    • use weird colons;
  • Repeat phrases
  • Verse number

The Bundle of Sticks
By Joy
          1 And thy old man gathereth his sons to giveth thine sons advice; and thy old man ordereth his servants to bringeth in a faggot of sticks;
2 And when they had done what thy old man had ordered, the old man told thine eldest son, breaketh thine faggot of sticks; when thine eldest son could not doeth so, each of thine other sons tryeth, none of the sons could doeth this command;
3 And thy old man continued untie thine faggot of sticks and each of thine sons take thine own stick,
4 And thine sons obeyed;
5 Now breaketh each thine own stick, and when thine sons had done this, thy old man saideth ye see thine meaning unity bringeth strength.



This next style is called Hans Christian Andersen. This style is written like a story to young readers. It is a very descriptive, engaging style. Some of it's unique qualities are:
  • Lots of similes (like/as)
  • Description ("paint" a picture with words)
  • Friendly Narration
    • 1st person- I/we
    • 2nd person- you
  • Adjectives (describes a noun)
  • Long sentences
The most important thing to recognize with this style is how descriptive it is. When writing with this style use every descriptive detail you can pull out of your brain.


The Bundle of Sticks
By Joy


On a bright beautiful morning with a slight breezy wind, an old man, at the point of death summoned his sons, who were working in a field, full of wheat, corn, and cotton.  While the eldest son was earnestly jogging to his father, the other five sons were slowly trudging along, as slow as a snail, they were also grunting and moaning, like a nearly dead whale .  The old man ordered his servants to bring him a bundle of sticks. They quickly did so.
Once the sons had come, as deliberate as possible, and the servants had brought a bundle of sticks the father ordered, “Sons, I want to teach you an exceedingly valuable lesson.  My eldest son break the bundle of sticks.”
When the eldest son had tried he said, “Father I can’t it is too thick, I would have to be as strong as an ox to do that.”  The other sons agreed.
The wise father continued, “Untie the bundle and each of you take your own stick and break it.” When the sons had done so the father stated, “You see my point with unity comes strength.”

Sunday, April 6, 2014

The Lego Movie: A Movie Review

The Lego Movie: A Movie Review

By Matthew




The Lego Movie is a wonderful animated movie about a lego minifigure named Emmett who finds a strange object stuck to his back that apparently Lord Business wants. Emmett goes on a lengthy journey because he is supposedly the ‘chosen one’, to stop Lord Business. Along the way he meet many friends including WildStyle, Batman, and Vitruvius.


This movie is funny and perfect for the family. While this is an awesome movie it was sometimes hard to keep track of why they were going places.  However, you don’t have to get every aspect of the plot to enjoy the movie. Even the littlest of kids will enjoy it! The jokes and funny parts in the movie meant for young and old alike. This movie is rated PG and is 1 hour 40 minutes long.

I rate this movie five out of five lego bricks.   

Clara Barton

Here is Matthew's version of Clara Barton.

Remembered to This Day

By:Matthew

     Extremely intelligent, extraordinarily brave, and exceedingly committed, Clara Barton, the Angel of the Battlefield became a heroine to girls for generations. Born on Christmas in 1821 in Oxford, Massachusetts, she was the youngest of seven children. While growing up in a typical farm family, she gained practical knowledge from being homeschooled, and became a teacher at a unusually young age. During the Civil War she rescued and revived hundreds of soldiers. She rested in Switzerland. There she learned about Switzerland’s Red Cross, which ultimately became her life’s work. She founded and led the American Red Cross until 1904, when she retired at the age of 83. Clearly her contributions have enriched the lives of many.
     
     Clara Barton who was shy, meek, and little, would someday be a school teacher successful hero to many people. When she was eleven she lovingly nursed her brother David from an illness. During her childhood her faithful father told her all kinds of war stories which inspired her to someday save lives in battle. When she was young she had a pet turkey. Now that’s a true tomboy.  Studying in the barn was something Clara enjoyed, and she was able to do that because she was homeschooled and lived on a farm.  Surprisingly as a 15 year old, Clara Barton became a school teacher and was really patient, which led to her success.

     When Clara Barton was a young adult she started to help in the battlefield by finding the Civil War soldier’s lost baggage, which was the beginning to saving many lives. Lovingly she helped the wounded soldiers get better. She was a wonderful teacher. She was awesome with wounds.She cared for the soldiers. On the battlefields there were sadly a lot of dead soldiers, and she rushed out on the battlefield to find missing soldiers often. Clara Barton also recorded missing men.  Helping in the battlefield  was something Clara Barton did, and it helped save many lives.

     Later on in Clara Barton’s life, the German huge war broke out and that’s when she joined the Red Cross, which was a great group. Taking care of the sick and wounded was what the Red Cross did, and that fit Clara Barton and was something she awesome at and something that she enjoyed doing. She would always say ‘you will be all right’ to the wounded she was caring for. Amazingly, they also helped deal with famines, floods, and earthquakes ‘Oh My’. Red Cross helped care for prisoners.  Clara Barton became the Red Cross President during the war also. Whenever there were unidentified dead people the Red Cross carefully identified them and helped arrange a burial. Clara Barton helped with all that.  As you can see, there was a huge transformation in her: from meek and shy to a hero to many people.

     Surprisingly, even though Clara Barton was the littlest and the youngest of the family, she became a hero to many desperate soldiers in the Civil War and helped establish the Red Cross in America. She never ever thought of herself and she always thought of others in fact one little girl asked her mom once “Is that lady an angel?”. She truly was amazing! While some people just wasted their lives, Clara Barton didn’t and while doing that she also saved many other lives which is what made her surely significant and remembered to this day.